


Me After You

by magicaltaekook0405



Category: Highlight | Beast (Band)
Genre: Angst, I Love You All, excuse me while I go cry in the corner, i really have no excuse for this, its literally angst i think my friend would hate me, please dont hate me, seriously i dont
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2019-07-04
Packaged: 2020-06-07 18:15:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19474645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magicaltaekook0405/pseuds/magicaltaekook0405
Summary: They were bestfriends, but feelings turned them into strangers.





	Me After You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [6olden9une](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=6olden9une).



> forgive me for this. i tried okay i tried

Everyday is a routine for Han Ina. She would wake up in her fluffy bed, open the balcony door to take in the fresh air, feed her cats and gets ready for her classes. She would ride her bike(just because she loves the nature) and go around the campus for a while before entering her lecture. Needless to say, she has a healthy lifestyle plus a very good grade. 

But for very unnecessary reasons, she decided to skip all the morning routine(except for the getting ready part) and skipped to the lecture as soon as she can. The reason was she had to quickly meet up with her friend for a very very VERY important meeting. 

"What should I wear? I'm really nervous."

Yup. That was the important matter they had to discuss. 

She was nervous, of course she was. Its been 3 months since she last saw her bestfriend. Ever since he decided to go for ealry enlistment, they haven't really talked. They couldn't really get in contact often either. Especially since he was serving in the transporting department. The only update she got were from the company, the media and sometimes from his close friends. That's all. 

So sue her if she's acting like a high school teenager waiting to meet her crush for the first time. 

When Areum informed her about the ARMY Sports Day, she got so overwhelmed she almost tripped on her heels in front of the hottest guy in campus. That was literally one of the most embarassing moments of her life, not even gonna lie. They both decided to go, givens that Areum was also wanting to go there, because of some obvious reasons. *cough the love of her life cough* 

So that actually brings them to the stadium filled with sweaty men in sports wear, cheering for the team of their choices (in all honesty, they were just cheering for everyone). Both of them tried to find both of their targets as they were enjoying the events but to no avail. 

An hour into the event, Ina finally saw a certain tall guy with a very pale complexion, walking like an Arab prince to a bench at the waiting area. They've known each other for a few years and it is impossible for Ina to miss that broad shoulders.

"Dongwoon ahh!" she called. He seemed like he heard her as he looked like he was looking for the direction of the voice. Ina called again for the second time and Dongwoon finally saw her. His eyes were widened in surprise, shoulders tensed, and body stiffed. Ina waved enthusiastically making Dongwoon waved back a few times before completely avoiding eye contact. 

To say that Ina wasn't affected by Dongwoon's indifferent act was a completely lie. Because as soon as she saw him trying to avoid eye contact with her, she knows something was wrong. 

Did he not want me to be here? Am I making him uncomfortable by being here? Should I go home?

Millions of questions started to flood her mind and before she made any decision to flee from the place, Areum pulled on her arms making her almost stumble on her knees. Her mind were playing a lot of different scenarios of her greeting her bestfriend again. 

Should I hug him? Should I tell him I missed him? Should I just jump on him and show him I really missed him? Or should I do all?

"H-hi!" 

Really? Stuttering? Great way to give off a first (after a while) impression Han Ina. Awesome job! 

She mentally cursed herself. But at least she had her biggest smile on her face. 

"What are you doing here?" he asked. The first words he uttered the moment he saw her. To say that Ina wasn't dissapointed would be a major understatement. But being the happy girl she is, she tried not to let it get to her.

"Why? You don't like seeing me?" She intended that to sound like she was joking but for some reason it came out sad.

Dongwoon saw the look in her eyes, he knows he wasn't supposed to ask that. 

"Its not that.. Its just..." he paused, before continuing, "Are you alone?" 

"No, I'm with Areum. She's-" she turned to look around and eventually saw Areum a few metres from where she was standing. "..there. With Yoseob." Dongwoon turned around and nodded before walking towards the two who were busy talking over sandwiches. Ina followed Dongwoon despite being in confusion of her bestfriend's act. 

"Hyung. Hi Areum." he greeted, with a smile on his face that didn't go unnoticed by Ina. And Ina could probably hear her heart breaks. She always felt that Dongwoon has a crush on her friend. They seemed very close and sometimes a little too close for her comfort. 

"Dongwoonieee~" Areum turned to give Dongwoon a hug which was reciprocated. They talked. And talked. And talked. At some point Ina felt left out. Replaced. Betrayed. Dongwoon rarely spare even a glance at her.  
She didn't know what to do. She was confused. What went wrong? How did it became like this? All those thoughts brought her back to the day she found out about Dongwoon's enlistment. 

***

"I don't know if it'll fit but I think its better if we try." Areum said before she was cut by a voice of someone softly screaming beside their table. Both of them turning to look and saw a group of girls trying not to scream. 

"I know it's gonna happen sooner or later. But my heart...." one person said. 

"I know right? So I guess the maknae is going too then. We're not even over Yoseob leaving and now this." 

Ina and Areum looked at each other. They were both trying to understand. They weren't eavesdropping but Yoseob's name made it hard for Areum to ignore. 

Yoseob? Maknae? Leaving?

Areum turned to Ina who was already on her phone, checking Naver. 

"Oh My-" Areum said when she saw the headline over Ina's shoulder and before she could finish her sentence, Ina quickly packed up to leave.

"I gotta go." 

"Ina-" 

\--

"Explain." is the only thing she said when she's finally in front of Dongwoon after almost 2 hours of looking around. 

"There's nothing to explain. I'm going to fulfill my duty, Ina. That's it." 

"Why didn't you tell me?" 

"What are you talking about? You talk as if it's a shocking news to you." 

"It is! I didn't know any of this!."

"Ina, it's been a news for a few months now. You know all of us decided to enlist at the same time. You should have seen this one coming. Even my fans already expect this." 

"Yes but you never told me you appealed again. The only thing I know was that you and Gikwang didn't pass the exam in the first round. Gikwang said he was appealing again but you never said anything." 

"You should've known that. It was our plan all along. If I failed, its only logic if I appealed again."

"It's still didn't explain the fact that you didn't tell me about this. You didn't even tell me that you already received the date of your enlistment. I had to find out from a damn news, Son Dongwoon! Do you know how painful that is? To know that your 'bestfriend' kept something so big a secret from you??" she stressed on the word enough to make Dongwoon felt something. "...Or am I just not important for you? I'm just the same as the thousands of fans you have. Is that it? Because that's how I see it." Her eyes was already red in anger and the tears pooling are just waiting for its cue to fall. It was very hard for her to keep it in. 

"I'm doing this for you. For me. For everyone. I don't want anyone to get hurt and I know I don't want to hurt myself. But that's not the case anymore anyways." he said making Ina almost had her head exploded. 

"What even are you saying? How is you not telling me anything is the best for me?" 

"Can we just not talk about this? I'm really tired and I need to sleep." Dongwoon said. Ina looked at him, not believing what she just heard. She scoffed. 

"Yeah, sure of course. Avoid the topic. Ignore me. Run away. Like you always do. That's the only thing you're good at anyways." she said and before Dongwoon could stop her, Ina walked out of the house, slamming the door loudly showing her anger.

***

She knows they weren't on the best terms but a day before his enlistment, everything seemed okay. They met and talked. So she thought everything was fine. They even had a movie cuddling session so why is he acting like this? They should talk. She should ask him what was wrong. She should-

"Dongwoon ah!" all of them turned to the voice. Upon seeing Dongwoon's bright smile, Ina's face distorts, obvious hurt was seen on her face. It was even more painful to see Dongwoon walking further away from her, following the girl. 

"Ina, are you okay?" Yoseob asked, looking at Ina. He was already standing beside her, seeming concerned. Ina turned to him, pulling a sad smile that Yoseob knows better. Since they've been friends for a long time, Yoseob and Dujun are the two people closest to Ina. But since Dujun was serving in another division, Yoseob took the roll alone, no questions asked. 

"Do you want to talk about it? Or do you want me to just drop it and we could go find ice cream?" he said, trying to lighten the mood. It worked because Ina smiled at him again and replied, "Ice cream would be awesome." 

Areum decided to leave them both to talk, because as eager as she wanted to comfort her bestfriend, she knows better than to pry. She knows Ina needs Yoseob at the moment so she made an excuse to go watch some football and find some eye candy, in which Yoseob replied with, "Just please get back here in one piece." 

"Hypothetically," Ina said, without looking at Yoseob, licking her ice cream in hand. Yoseob raised his eyebrows at her, asking her to continue. "..... if someone is keeping distance from you, what do you think is wrong?" she asked, when they were sitting at one of the benches near the field. Yoseob's forehead frowned for a moment before his face softens. 

"Hypothetically," he made a face and smiled before continuing, ".. in my opinion, maybe that 'someone' has their reason. I'm not sure if he's trying to hide anything or just wanting to be alone but I guess finding out would be the best decision." 

"How?" 

"Ask him. I think the problem with you two is that you never talk about important things. If you fight, one of you would just apologise and you'll be cuddling the next minute. I mean I'm not saying its a bad thing, but sometimes some things need to be discussed. For example, your feelings."

"But I didn't-" 

"I know, Ina. You have feelings for him, ever since high school. And I dont think he's oppose to that idea either. I don't get why all this while you two aren't even together yet. You've been playing a game you two clearly wasn't too keen with. And the worst part is you guys aren't even subtle. Even me and Areum made far more progress than you two." He said, making a point. Ina looked at her feet, no words came out of her lips. What Yoseob said was right. She never really thought about how their relationship would go beyond just being bestfriends. The accepting part was already scary for her. Her having to confess her feelings is the last thing she ever wants.

"I don't know if he'll ever say anything about this. He's too oblivious for his own good. Talk to him. What's the worst thing that could happen? You're already on ignoring terms anyway." Yoseob said, clearly trying to joke at the end. Ina thought for a moment. 

What's the worst that can happen right?

***

The thing is, there is something worst than not talking to each other. And that is TRYING to make Dongwoon talk to you. 

He's been ignoring Ina for the rest of the day and when she tried to approach him, he'll go for another round of basketball or something less sporty and ridiculous like smashing his face into a flour to find small pendants. Ina realised that he was avoiding her, of course, she's not stupid. But the thing that made her so mad was that he was always with this one girl wearing a soldier shirt that has a medical batch attached to her shirt. 

And no, Han Ina is most definitely NOT jealous. 

"You're burning." a voice suddenly said from behind her as she was staring at the two who was clearly having fun giggling beside the team bench. 

"Oh hi Minhyuk." she said, showing less enthusiastic and weak. 

"Wow, that's it? No, happy jumps and greeting hugs?" Minhyuk said before his face turned into a smile when Ina hugged him. 

"You don't look so good. Did Dongwoon bully you again?" Ina smiled at the protective guy besides her while shaking her head.

"No, not really. I'm just thinking." she said , trying to divert her attention from the couple as well as changing the topic. 

"But you clearly were staring at them." clearly Minhyuk could sense what was going on as he said that because his head nodded at Dongwoon's direction. That made Ina sighed in devastation again. 

"If you dont feel like talking about it, I won't ask." he said and Ina smiled weakly. 

"Thank you.. I appreciate that." 

"So, its been a long time since I've seen you. How are you?" Since they were about to talk, they decided to sit one of the spectators' seats. They talked a lot, catching up until Minhyuk had to go prepare for his next event. After cheering for Minhyuk, Ina saw Dongwoon sitting alone, playing with his phone at the corner of the bleachers. She decided to go to him.

"Hey." Dongwoon looked up and he visibly stiffens for a moment before trying to find his escape.

"I need to-" 

"Stop that! You don't need anything. Can you just please sit here and talk to me?" she said, voice stern as she stand in front of him. Dongwoon sighed. 

"About what?" 

"I don't know, Son Dongwoon, you tell me. You've been ignoring me for a whole day and I'm pretty much confused with a lot of things too. I'm the one in need of explanations here." she said, not even trying to be soft. You can say her temper could've gone way worse but since they're in public and she didn't want to embarassed Dongwoon or herself, Ina decided to just keep in calm. 

She saw Dongwoon fidgetting, trying to come out with something. 

"I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about." he said and to say Ina was furious would be a major understatement. 

"Can you PLEASE just stop it? You know exactly what I'm talking about and you have all the answers and now if you just stop running away from me everytime you see my face, I very much appreciate that." she said looking straight into Dongwoon's eyes. 

Dongwoon visibly sighed, his shoulder seems less tensed than before and he finally looked towards Ina. 

"Fine. I'm taking the day off tomorrow. Meet me at the usual and we'll talk." 

"Why can't we just talk now?" 

"Trust me, you don't want to." Seeing Dongwoon's face change, Ina knows she shouldn't be asking for more. 

"Fine. Only if you promise we'll talk tonight." she said and Dongwoon nodded.

***

Night time comes faster than its supposed to. At least for Ina it did. She tried not to look too nervous about but really, who was she kidding? Everyone could literally sense it. 

"You could maybe stop pacing too much. I'm dizzy just by watching you." Areum said, eyes glued to the laptop in front of her. Hearing Ina's heavy sigh, she looked up. 

"You wanted to have this talk, Ina. What changed?" 

"Yes but that doesn't mean I can't be nervous about it." 

"Don't worry too much. Just let everything out of your chest. Trust me, it'll be fine." Areum tried to give reassuring words to comfort a nervous Ina, and if she could be honest, its not really helping that much. Sure, if its any other times, Ina would appreciate and believe in Areum's words but today is a completely different story. She's going to be completely honest to the person she's been in love with for the past 10 years, who also happens to be her bestfriend. Its not actually a good combination if she's honest. Especially if the said bestfriend is Son Dongwoon. 

After battling with her mind and heart, Ina decided to put on a black jeans and a blue oversized sweater, just to look more calm and to hide the fire in her chest. She took off after about 30 minutes of convincing herself that everything will turn out fine. 

When she arrived at the park, she looked for the person she was supposed to meet. And as usual, Dongwoon was always punctual for their meetings. He was already at the swings, their usual waiting area, with ice creams in his hands. Ina approached him before clearing her throat to let him know she's there. For once, their meeting is full of awkwardness and Ina was starting to regret her idea of meeting him that night. Dongwoon turned to Ina to greet her before handing her one of the ice creams he was holding. She took it before sitting beside the boy. 

For about 10 minutes, they sat there in silence, eating their ice cream accompanied by the soft sounds of the water from the river splashing and the voices of distant chatters from the late night visitors of the park. 

"Before you say anything, let me say something first." Dongwoon suddenly voiced out, without looking at Ina. Ina lifted her brow, a bit surprised by what he said. 

"What happened to ladies first?" she said, teasingly. 

"Yeah well, I'm not applying that to our situation as of this moment." Ina chuckled before nodding, giving a sign that Dongwoon should speak first. She was actually planning to let Dongwoon tell her his side of the story before jumping into any conclusions or rash decisions and she was actually very thankful that he wanted to. If not, it won't be very easy to convince that overgrown child.

Dongwoon's face falls again. The air around them went cold again.

"I know what I'm gonna say will make you hate me. But I dont think I can do this anymore. Its really hard for me but I think its better for me say this before it go further than this." 

Ina waited for Dongwoon to talk. Saying she's nervous was totally an understatement. She felt her palms sweating. 

"I like you. A lot actually." 

Ina felt her breath hitched. That wasn't what she was expecting. But just as she was about to say something, but what Dongwoon said after made her heart breaks into a million pieces. 

"W-why not?" 

"I wanted to tell you this before. But I dont want you to feel pressured. I didnt want you to have to wait for me. I didnt want you to sacrifice your life for me." 

"What do you mean?" 

"I know you're planning to continue your studies in Stanford." Ina's eyes grew wide at the information. 

"H-how?" 

"Your mom told me. I saw the offer letter you got from Standford and I asked her. She didnt want to tell me but I forced it out on her. I know you're contemplating your decision and I know its partly because of me."

"I'm-" she was speechless. She didn't know it was more than just a mere misunderstanding.

"I'm not mad at you, if thats what you're worried about. But I don't think I want to be the reason why you're not living your dreams. That's why I decided to apply again, and I didnt want to tell you because I didn't want you to ask me questions I cant answer. I didn't do it because of you, but thats one of the major reasons. I wanted to be here, I wanted to finish my training with the hyungs so I guess it's a good timing. I want you to go to Standford. Go there and make your dreams come true. Dont think about me-"

"Wait wait wait, Stop!" Dongwoon lift his face to look at Ina. Her face wasn't sad anymore, she seemed angry. He didnt know why.

"You meant to say, the reason why you ignore me is because you wanted me to go and forget you? Is that it?" she's trying to controp her temper but Dongwoon knows she's about to lose it. 

"No, I-" 

"Who am I to you, Son Dongwoon? Am I just someone you met and be friends with then when you dont need me anymore you just throw me away? And how low do you think I am for you to even THINK that its easy for me to leave and forget you just like you never meant anything to me?" 

"Ina, that's not what I meant.." he said, she was clearly seeing this in the wrong way.

"Then what?! Tell me what does it mean? Even if I have to go, I wouldn't be able to forget you. You know why? Because you're my freaking bestfriend!" she paused, "...well," she let out a bitter chuckle, "at least to me you are."

"I want you to go for your dreams! I want you to be happy! I want you to find what you love! I didn't want to be the reason that hold you back from your happiness! I just want you to do what you want!" 

"What do I want? Do you even know what the heck I want? Why can't you talk to me first? Why do you always want to decide things for me? This is my life and you dont have the rights to control it!"

"I just didn't want you to regret everything."

"Are you listening to yourself? The only thing you're saying are of what you want. Why cant you ask me what I want?" she said, her voice falls and she was starting to tear up. 

"Why can't you just ask me? Talk to me. Why do we always have to fight? Why does it have to hurt both of us? I'm tired, I'm really tired, Dongwoon-ah." she started to sob, sitting on the bench with her head low, trying to control her emotions that was running wild. Guilt crept up to Dongwoon's heart and he was starting to feel like punching himself. He put his arms around Ina and pulled her into his embrace, trying to console her. 

"I came here to tell you that I love you. I've been in love with you for the past years and I was planning on telling you truth. I'm really tired with this push and pull game we're playing and I wanted it to end. I want to be with you so we could both be happy again." she said when she calmed down. She pulled herself from Dongwoon, away to pull out a tissue from her bag and wiped her face. Dongwoon looked at her in surprise. Although he was already having the feeling that Ina shared the same feelings with him, he just wasnt sure that she would act upon it. He was happy, at least he knows his feelings was mutual.

"But I'll go. You made it clear to me that you want me to go. So I will. I guess I could try to move on from you if thats what you want from me." 

"I do love you, Ina. You know I do."

"But not enough to make you trust me. Its okay, I understand." she took a deep breath, before wiping her tears again. She knows she will break her own heart but its what he wants. Ina smiled before getting up from her seat, making Dongwoon look at her with confused eyes. 

"Don't worry about me. I'll be back with a cute blue eyed boyfriend in three years." she let out a beaming smile, trying to lift the mood. Dongwoon was speechless and confused but he didn't have anything better to say. 

"You'll come send me off right?" she asked and he nodded hesitantly. "Great! Then I'll see you in two weeks then!" she said, and then pulled her bag to sling it to her shoulder. 

"I have to go now, I have a meeting tomorrow morning." she said and she hugged him goodbye. As she wanted to let go, she felt him tighten the hug and at that moment, the tears she was trying to safe, falls right on her cheeks. 

Ina pulled away and smiled, tears in her eyes. 

"I'll see you later." he said, Ina nodded with her sad smile. 

Ina decided to turn away as she felt her head spinning. She walked away, leaving her heart broken into pieces and as she took a step forward, her tears fell again and this time, she didn't have the strength to stop it anymore. 

Little did she know, she wasn't the only one with a broken heart that night.

**Author's Note:**

> To the 2 readers who read this, 
> 
> thankyou so much for keeping up with my bs till the end. It means a lot to me. 
> 
> and to you, the person who this fic is dedicated to, yes YOU, i hope you're happy with this. AND PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!


End file.
